The Bedroom

The objects of this painting are constants. A cot, two chairs one by the table and other adjacent to the door to the guest room which was planned for Gauguin, which stayed empty forever. He was desperate for Gauguin to come over. Paintings in the wall. A mirror and a towel hanging. A jug on the table. And to prove that the three versions of this room and two other in the sketches sent to Theo with his letters were not from his memory but that he sat opposite to the window to sketch or paint them. Because his hat, coat and scarf are hung at different positions.

What distinguishes all these three are the colours. His house is famously known as The Yellow House. And he has mentioned in his letters to Theo, alongside the sketches that the colour has to do the job. He wanted this piece to feel like rest. He said, "Looking at the painting should rest the mind, or rather, the imagination." Why? Why rest? Why rest the mind, the imagination?

It is funny how the grass is greener on the side we dream upon. Delusion is a tricky rumination. It is a medicine, when things are acted upon, and the magic is witnessed. Otherwise, it is indeed a poison. Van Gogh has been striving to find a place for himself in the world. For his art, for his vision, for his work and dedication. Was he not just denied that acknowledgement but also was looked down upon. His work was treated like it was uncanny when he was alive. Maybe he needed rest. His mind needed rest. His imagination of how it would turn out when it all worked out, his imagination of what kind of work he could do to turn out better needed a rest.

He did have trouble sleeping. Is that why he wanted to paint his bedroom and not any other space? The first version is more bright yellow and mustard surrounded by pale blue walls. Where as the second version has dominant bluish tint to the walls and doors. And the yellow is more bright. While the third version has more refined outlines. The self-portrait of Van Gogh is clear, and another unknown portrait.

He refined this painting. Was he aware that space would matter to him in the future when Gauguin comes over? Or was he lonely? The first version calms our mind and imagination like he aimed it to. But his need to be better, to make better, to achieve better, kills the rest (sleep) in both his paintings and his life. It could be tragic. That he never got to see how he has been celebrated in the future. But he and his works stands out for his persistence. He was aware that he would blow big, he wasn't aware when. And he was ready all through his life. That yearning makes an artist not rest and sleep, but be alive and active for as long as the sun beams yellow through his blue windowsills.